Pouncer ([info]thepouncer) wrote in [info]sga_flashfic,

Journey to Green Bay by Pouncer

Rating: PG
Genre: Gen
Challenge: First Contact
Summary: One of the Voyagers had captured the big red spot in all its full-color glory, the farthest human eyes had ever traveled. Sheppard had never thought he’d see anything like it in person.


Journey to Green Bay
by Pouncer

This week’s gate orbited a gas giant. The MALP’s camera showed how the planet’s atmosphere swirled together green and amber and white, with rings that arched at an oblique angle to the stargate. McKay and Zelenka had both been stymied when asked why the Ancients would have done such a thing. Every other orbital gate they had stumbled upon had circled a habitable world.

“Do I look like a mind-reader?” McKay had snapped at last. Zelenka had just shrugged, a puzzled expression on his face. Grodin was trying to figure out how to retrieve the MALP.

Weir had told Sheppard to be careful while checking out the solar system. As if he would be anything but careful, now that he’d survived lost cities and soul-eating aliens and life-sucking bugs and explosives-crazy totalitarians. He smirked in reply and went to order McKay to bring along extra sensor equipment and the digital camera. Sheppard had always liked pictures of planets, ever since that issue of Life devoted to Jupiter had distracted him from the hostages in Iran. One of the Voyagers had captured the big red spot in all its full-color glory, the farthest human eyes had ever traveled. He’d never thought he’d see anything like it in person.

His team armed up, just in case they found a planet with a breathable atmosphere. McKay must have felt compelled to note, “You know, the Ancients could have wanted to reach a moon. Titan in our own solar system has an atmosphere. Not oxygen-nitrogen, of course, but there might be some life there. I wish I could have been there to see what Cassini found.”

Sheppard looked at McKay steadily. “You’re in another galaxy, Rodney. You’ve found plenty on your own.”

McKay looked pleased, a hint of his natural smugness replacing the longing. “Why yes, I have.” He donned his flak vest. “Well, come along. We should really get started.”

* * *


The planet, which Ford wanted to name Corwin after some book he’d read in his far-too-recent adolescence, possessed moons in abundance. All of them bare rock, unprotected from the vacuum of space. Sheppard flew ever-increasing spiral orbits around the planet, which he was not going to name Corwin. Maybe Green Bay, instead. Or Favre.

McKay hummed under his breath from where he was interpreting his arcane readouts. Sheppard ignored him, but at last Teyla broke. “Dr. McKay, have you found something?” She’d been sitting in that chair with nothing to occupy her for quite a while. Sheppard thought they should bring one of the laptops and some DVDs the next time they did this. And popcorn. Although he wasn’t really tired of the view yet.

McKay peered more closely at his Ancient PDA. “I don’t know. There’s something very strange about that planet.”

“It’s a gas giant, Rodney. What wouldn’t be strange?”

“I do keep up with the astronomy literature, you know, Major.” Sheppard loved it when McKay got all offended that his scientific dignity might have been slighted. “Gas giants in our solar system share certain characteristics, and this planet is just … off.”

Off? Off how?” Sheppard was really going to have to work on McKay’s ability to concisely convey information in the field.

“I said I don’t know, Major.” A slight pause while McKay’s eyes went blank in the way that meant he was making some intuitive leap that none of the rest of them could follow. “Although. Hmmm.”

“Hmmm?” Sheppard was sure that McKay was teasing him now.

“Can you fly us closer to the atmosphere?” McKay’s eyes had refocused and he turned the full force of his attention on Sheppard. It was like having the universe’s most intense Golden Retriever begging to go for a walk.

“Closer? How much closer?” Sheppard was dubious.

“Maybe just inside the outermost gaseous layer?” McKay had blinked. Sheppard had seen it.

“Inside the …? Rodney. Do you know what the pressure levels could do to this ship? We don’t know what its tolerance specifications are!” One of the first things Sheppard had learned in flight school was always protect the aircraft. The instructor hadn’t gone into these specific circumstances, but Sheppard thought he should take extra care when surrounded by hard vacuum with backup solar systems away.

“It wouldn’t be that far inside, Major. I just need to get closer to see –“ and here McKay veered off into scientist-speak that Sheppard couldn’t translate.

The air of wounded eagerness that McKay was projecting finally made Sheppard knuckle under. “Fine! Fine. We’ll go just inside.”

“Sir,” Ford tried to object, but Sheppard overrode him ruthlessly, now that he’d given in.

“No, Lieutenant, I can see that Rodney will sulk the entire way home if he doesn’t get to visit the gas giant and take pictures to all his friends back in the lab for show and tell.” Sheppard looked at Ford’s stolid face, which didn’t hide his trepidation nearly as well as the lieutenant thought. “Don’t worry, Ford. I can fly anything, anywhere.”

Teyla just nodded when Sheppard glanced at her.

The lightest of thoughts and the Jumper curved closer to the planet while avoiding the clustered ice and rock of its rings. Sheppard busied himself trying to recall what this type of orbit would have been called back on Earth. He’d always flown too close to the ground to care how far his eyes in the sky were above him. Those space guys had the wackiest designations for their satellite’s paths – HEO, GEO, LEO, like they all belonged on Old McDonald’s farm.

Sheppard decided that McKay would have to be content with the top third of Favre’s atmosphere. He aimed for a green band of clouds, probably some caustic chemical that would eat through the Jumper’s hull. There was a little turbulence as he hit the outer edges, and a spike of excitement that Sheppard didn’t think he would ever get used to. He was flying a spaceship through the atmosphere of an alien planet. The things you got into, ferrying generals around.

McKay was completely focused on his sensor data, and a quick peek back showed Ford’s hands digging into the armrests of his chair. Teyla was poised, tense and ready for action. Sheppard eased a few hundred meters down into the murk, trusting that the Jumper knew what he wanted it to do.

He was the first one to see it, a glimpse off the bottom right of the viewscreen. Sheppard thought it was a shadow at first, a darker patch of cloud, but it kept getting closer and bigger.

“Rodney.” His voice modulated up and down the two syllables.

“Hmmm?” Just like McKay, to miss this.

“Rodney, do you see what I’m seeing?” Sheppard knew his voice was a little too urgent, but he was too jazzed to care. He pointed at the shadow, whose edges were becoming clearer.

McKay sat beside Sheppard, speechless for once.

Another one swooped from above them, tumbling around the first. They began to dance a spiral in front of the Jumper, delicate translucent wings floating out from a slim central carapace. A third joined them, another alien combination of butterfly and jellyfish and hang-glider.

“Rodney, get the camera. We’re going to need pictures or they’ll never believe us back on Atlantis.” Sheppard gestured toward the cargo hold where their equipment was stored. He didn’t stop watching the pas de trois being performed to lead the Jumper onwards.

Teyla and Ford were muttering to each other, but Sheppard couldn’t make out the words.

McKay returned and shot digital images one after another as an entire flock of the aliens appeared to escort the Jumper. “Why didn’t I bring the video camera? Why?”

Sheppard watched the fluttering wings create geometric patterns, and didn’t care.

-end-




Notes: “Corwin” is from Roger Zelazny’s Amber series. I shamelessly stole the concept of the aliens from C.S. Friedman’s The Madness Season. My thanks to [info]kageygirl for her beta efforts.

Disclaimer: If they were mine, Sheppard would be shirtless a lot more often.
Tags: author: thepouncer, challenge: first contact

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  • 40 comments

[info]g_shadowslayer

April 15 2005, 18:38:47 UTC 7 years ago

This is so cool -- I remember way back when I was a kid going to the planetarium, and they had a show about what life might be like on Jupiter, and they had kind of jellyfish/squid things swooping around in the sky... :)

Nicely done, and I had a feeling that Corwin was from Amber. Yay for Zelazny!

[info]thepouncer

April 15 2005, 19:36:19 UTC 7 years ago

It's entirely possible Ms. Friedman got her idea from that type of presentation. I remember an April Fool's article published in the Washington Post in the mid-90s that said NASA had discovered similar life forms on Jupiter. I was all agog until I looked at the calendar!

I'm glad you enjoyed the story - thanks for commenting.

[info]minnow1212

April 15 2005, 18:57:10 UTC 7 years ago

This is wonderful. The sense of wonder and adventure and discovery that's in this just makes me grin like an idiot.

>“Do I look like a mind-reader?” McKay had snapped at last. Zelenka had just shrugged, a puzzled expression on his face. Grodin was trying to figure out how to retrieve the MALP.<

Heh. That's perfect.

>It was like having the universe’s most intense Golden Retriever begging to go for a walk.<

:falls over laughing:

[info]thepouncer

April 15 2005, 19:37:11 UTC 7 years ago

I have Bichon Frise's, but Rodney reminds me of a Golden Retriever something fierce. I had a blast writing this - I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[info]nindulgence

April 15 2005, 19:11:04 UTC 7 years ago

Journey to Green Bay

I like the way you're working your research into this fic: it's great to see the characters in action here (and I really liked "always protect the aircraft").

Your first paragraph made me do a bit of a double-take: reading too quickly at first, I had to go back and really picture your opening image, once its significance was pointed out. And a very cool image it was.

Thanks for writing!

~∞

[info]thepouncer

April 15 2005, 19:38:47 UTC 7 years ago

Re: Journey to Green Bay

I have been laughing at myself about how much I'm researching combat helicopters - they'd never really interested me before Shep. I was all about the jets and the missiles.

I'm glad the imagery worked for you on second reading. I wasn't sure if that sentence came together quite right.

Thanks for commenting!

[info]sweeneybird

April 15 2005, 19:56:24 UTC 7 years ago

McKay’s eyes had refocused and he turned the full force of his attention on Sheppard. It was like having the universe’s most intense Golden Retriever begging to go for a walk.

BWAHAHA! Perfect Rodney description. This was really cool.

[info]thepouncer

April 15 2005, 20:36:07 UTC 7 years ago

I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[info]elishavah

April 15 2005, 20:20:02 UTC 7 years ago

Yay! Space is pretty! John appreciating pretty space and all the details are wonderful.

Grodin was trying to figure out how to retrieve the MALP.

Heh. Seriously, what did they do to deal with the gates in orbit? (Like I need another random SGA thought to think about.)

[info]thepouncer

April 15 2005, 20:38:16 UTC 7 years ago

I think about minor details like retrieving the MALP all the time! I was even trying to come up with some suggestions for Grodin to make, with plans for a tether, until I remembered that the wormhole only allows one way travel.

You just know Shep would be glad to take some time to enjoy the scenery. It was ages before SG-1 got to zoom around in spaceships, but for Sheppard the idea of interstellar travel didn't have time to get stale with repetition.

[info]ex_danvers514

April 15 2005, 20:22:29 UTC 7 years ago

I enjoyed this *very* much. Especially this part:

“You know, the Ancients could have wanted to reach a moon. Titan in our own solar system has an atmosphere. Not oxygen-nitrogen, of course, but there might be some life there. I wish I could have been there to see what Cassini found.”

Sheppard looked at McKay steadily. “You’re in another galaxy, Rodney. You’ve found plenty on your own.”


Very cool.

[info]thepouncer

April 15 2005, 20:39:23 UTC 7 years ago

I see Rodney as this incredible overachiever, who wants to do it all. He need to be reminded of what he's managed to do, sometimes. I'm glad you liked it!

Also, yay Billie Joe! His penchant for eyeliner is far too endearing.

[info]teaphile

April 15 2005, 20:56:42 UTC 7 years ago

Very nice. There's a sense of peace and wonder about the last part, as and after you describe the jellyfish.

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 04:26:35 UTC 7 years ago

I'm glad that came through. I wanted the experience to let them all revel in their unique circumstances for a change, instead of being terrified by them.

[info]rivier

April 15 2005, 21:05:53 UTC 7 years ago

Lovely stuff. I feel that sense of explorer-adventure that John and Rodney both share, and I love the way that Rodney is so fixated on pushing the boundaries, while John has tghe e ver-present instinct to protect and survive. I also relished, very much, the way that you have them both playing each other all the time, and how Shep goes from controlling the run of play to knowing that he's being spoofed.

Mmmm, delicious! Oh dear, my squee is stirring and muttering again...

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 04:27:36 UTC 7 years ago

I had so much fun writing this! I was all "they must banter and snark while still respecting each other!" *orders squee to revive*

Orders, I say!

[info]kitakatzz

April 15 2005, 21:12:13 UTC 7 years ago

The things you got into, ferrying generals around.
Hee.
Anywho- I really liked this. Nobody was in any danger, and it was just like... I dunno'. A 'normal', happy mission. So, yeah. Great job. (:

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 04:27:48 UTC 7 years ago

I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[info]coreopsis

April 15 2005, 21:36:29 UTC 7 years ago

Awww, this is really nice! I love seeing that adventurous spirit in all of them. And John's fondness for planet photos just warms my space-geek loving heart. *g*

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 04:28:10 UTC 7 years ago

I just know he was a deep space geek.

[info]_bettina_

April 15 2005, 21:54:37 UTC 7 years ago

Hee! So much fun, I really liked this.

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 04:28:18 UTC 7 years ago

Yay! I'm glad.

[info]tayawulf

April 15 2005, 22:33:10 UTC 7 years ago

I have to admit, I'm sitting here laughing my ass off. **Not** at the story, which was wonderfully written, but at the fact that I have spent the last two days outlining this *exact same idea*. LOL!! I, too, was going to have a gate orbiting a gas giant, and no one knowing why, and them seeing huge floaty lifeforms in the atmosphere. My inspiration? The Time-Life book my parents bought right around 1979 or 1980 called "Our Universe" which had an artists' rendition of what life in Jupiter's atmosphere might look like: huge floating "jellyfish" and bird-like things that lived on them and cleaned them, etc. Did you own the same thing, pouncer?
I'm really glad you wrote this: you did a much better job of it than I ever could. You've got their voices down solid. And you've got the right sense of humor for this fandom; the Zelazny reference was great.
I'm still giggling.

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 04:29:43 UTC 7 years ago

The hive mind strikes again! I was sitting in this really boring work meeting last Tuesday, and trying to come up with *something* for this challenge when I remembered an alien character in Friedman's novel who lived in a gas giant. And then it was astonishingly easy to write. I don't think I ever saw the book you mention, but maybe that's where Friedman got the idea.

[info]burntcopper

April 15 2005, 22:37:24 UTC 7 years ago

ooo, pretty. plus Rodney as Golden Retriever! hee!

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 04:30:19 UTC 7 years ago

I gave far too much thought to what kind of dog he would be. My own are bichons, but that doesn't suit Rodney at all.

[info]jenlev

April 15 2005, 23:46:39 UTC 7 years ago

oh i love john pondering that of course he'd be *careful*. that's perfect. as is this: "Sheppard looked at McKay steadily. “You’re in another galaxy, Rodney. You’ve found plenty on your own.”"

delightful that rodney would be wondering about cassini. hee!

and oh, i love their excitement and courage and sheer astonishment. this is lovely.

ps. i bet rodney brings the video camera *next* time. hee!


[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 04:31:45 UTC 7 years ago

I just know that Rodney is this scientific overachiever who wants to do it all and regrets that he can't. Of course, after this mission he'll be insufferably smug about their discoveries.

Am I the only one who actually thinks its really strange that the Jumpers don't seem to have any kind of recording equipment on board?

[info]jenlev

7 years ago

[info]grey_bard

April 16 2005, 05:26:09 UTC 7 years ago

Oh, man. So very, very cool. Yes. They aren't just exploring, they're explorers, and that means seeing all kinds of cool things for the first time.

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 04:32:33 UTC 7 years ago

I'm glad you liked it. I have another Sheppard thing I'm working on that's all about the angst, so it was very cool to attempt to evoke a different tone with this story.

[info]danamaree

April 17 2005, 10:27:16 UTC 7 years ago

Reminds me of the aliens from Arthur C Clark's 'A Space Odyssey' in the atmosphere of Jupiter.

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 20:18:16 UTC 7 years ago

The concept is definitely not original. I can just imagine how euphoric Sheppard and McKay were when they got back to Atlantis.

[info]danamaree

7 years ago

[info]celli

April 17 2005, 16:29:06 UTC 7 years ago

oooh, cool.

[info]thepouncer

April 17 2005, 20:18:28 UTC 7 years ago

Thank you for reading!

[info]raucousraven

April 18 2005, 04:30:31 UTC 7 years ago

THIS IS SO COOL. You've really captured what it might be like to go cautiously careening into the unknown and emerge with aliens on camera, WTFBBQ. I used to dream about moments like this. Thank you for reviving the wonder.

[info]thepouncer

April 18 2005, 17:26:51 UTC 7 years ago

Yay! I'm glad you liked it.

[info]serialkarma

May 16 2005, 13:20:29 UTC 7 years ago

So I'm working my way through the flashfics and dude, I love this. For so many, many reasons. The aliens and Sheppard's quiet amazement at what his life is like and that he wants to name a planet Favre. So much love!

[info]thepouncer

May 16 2005, 14:16:58 UTC 7 years ago

Yay! I'm glad you enjoyed it - I had far too much fun writing it. The little details made me giggle *g*
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